I hatched a plan before going to a Mayday Parade concert

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But didn’t a poem say that the best laid plans of mice and men often go awry?

So the concert was to start at 8PM, and the doors to open at 6PM. I definitely need to make a plan first.

What time should I go to the concert? 12PM is too early. Do I really need to be there before the staff? The bouncers? Definitely overdoing it. 5PM is too late, there will be too many people. 4PM is good, not excessive and normal people go to 8PM concerts at 4PM. Sounds good, I’ll go at 4PM!!!

What do I wear? I really want to wear short shorts, my 2-year-old canon low dark pink pony shoes, and a white shirt. But it’s too OOTD-ish! It isn’t like I am going to try and impress someone??? Right! I am going to settle with a black tank top, dark blue skinny jeans, and black boots. I wear it in front of the mirror and I look like a part of the band and I am not a part of the band and I am just attending a concert and everyone will be singing and why the fuck am I beating myself up for what I am GOING TO WEAR?!?!?! I AM SO MAD! So I didn’t actually settle with the all black old school emo attire. A dress that stops halfway through my legs, and medium-high gladiator skin tone sandals is good. YES, YES, YES. This looks better. Yeah! The concert’s gonna rock!

What do I say when I arrive at the concert hall? “Hi, where should I line up? I have a royalty ticket.” LAME! And impolite! “Hi sir,” I say to the bouncer and he’s gonna ask me what kind my ticket is and he’s gonna point me to the right line. That sounds so much better. I have to talk less and less is good for socially awkward people who make plans for freaking concerts! That’s pretty impeccable, self. Attagirl!

Should I talk to people? I should. Right? Those who will attend love Mayday Parade as well after all. I should definitely talk to people. Like, “Hi. Is it your first time?” “Hey, you excited?” I will probably be sweating so much from so much agitation and the heebie-jeebies.

What should I bring? I have a dslr camera and I have a pass so I should bring it. But it would be too heavy, my iPhone should do. I should also bring my iPad, in case my phone dies from its pathetically low battery lifespan. An umbrella, earphones, charger, scarf (I easily get cold), and also, money enough for band merch. God knows how expensive band merchs are at concerts! Fucking commercialization, right? Haha :D And not to forget, a book! I mean, duh? Books are life and I can’t go anywhere without a book so I should bring a book. Nerdy!!! What book though? Not a Cassandra Clare kind of thick book definitely. Something that I have not read, been wanting to read for so long, and that is handy. Aha! Ready Player One should do.

I was all set! I went to the concert and arrived at 4PM. And there were a lot of people! I knew I should have gone earlier! Probably 4PM the previous day!

I asked a bouncer where should I fall in line and he points me somewhere, so I went there and then they tell me they aren’t Royalty so I had to ask another bouncer (I’m going to freaking die of anxiety!!!) and he points me to another line and so I went there and to be reprimanded again! This is insane!!! And then finally, I was pointed to the right line, thank god.

Then the concert started and everyone is excited and the place was raucous, so loud, and everyone’s pushing and jumping and I was helplessly going where the falling bodies are well falling. And my feet! MY FEET GOT STOMPED SO MANY TIMES! Why did I wear sandals?! Whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy? That’s the most idiotic plan ever.

But I enjoyed so much! I loved the crowd, the noise, the sweat, the out-of-tune singing, the jumping, and the headbanging! It was so amazing I cried. I went to the concert alone so I was left to my emotions and it was beautiful.

Did you see me mention reading the book I brought? No, I did not. I am not exactly good at making plans. Sew me. :p

I also got so tired from jumping and singing and jumping that I almost lost my breathing. And I didn’t bring my meds, I already said I suck at making plans, right? So I toned down the singing, I stopped jumping for awhile and watched the people around me, smiling their biggest smiles while I catch my breath.

Came the after party. But wait, I did buy a band merch, it was a shirt. And as I have said, it was freaking expensive so I got that part of my plan right. Aha!

I fell in line with a newly found friend, Ivy from PUP. Yaaas! I got myself a friend! ;) So I was waiting till I get to the members of the band and get my new MP band shirt signed. I was shaking so bad like WHAT AM I GOING TO SAY?!?!?!?!?! WHAT SHOULD I SAY?!?!?!

YOU WERE GREAT!!! ?

I LOVE YOU SO MUCH DEREK!!!! ?

YOU’RE SO HANDSOME, JAKE! I GOTTA TAKE YOU HOME!!!! ?

I didn’t say those obviously. My neurons will probably kill themselves from the unreal absurdity of their owner. Though I did say that they throw the best concert ever and that I’ve been a fan for 11 years and I love them and can I get a hug?

I GOT A HUGGGG!!!!!

I got home and I was crying and I was happy and I know no one will understand my emotions so I didn’t tell anyone how the entirety of it undid my soul and that I absolutely just had THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.

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#SOMUCHLOVE

Identity Crisis: The Anj Version

When you have a burning passion towards a lot of things, it takes more than money to pacify your feisty self. I should know, I am currently in a position where my role in this society is a constant burning confusion in my head.

It’s been a year since I was first employed and sans the canards, and contretemps in the office, it was quite the good life I have never had. It was enough to satisfy my needs and various… indulgence but soul satisfaction is another thing.

I have my fair share of regrets. When I was reviewing for the board exam, I wasn’t exactly… reviewing. I was reading books, I watched sports, I always made it a point that I am sleepy whenever it’s time to read my notes. I was slacking. That’s me – always putting important things off until I don’t have any more enough time.

I knew I was going to pass the board exam. It wasn’t because of arrogance but I firmly believed what I was capable of. But that did not stop me from jumping up and down when I was finally the Registered Pharmacist I’ve been dreaming of for years. It didn’t matter what my passing rate was, I was an RPh regardless if I had a flat 75%. Then came out the breakdown of my passing rate and I have not felt so penitent my entire life. To be so close to the 10 topnotches yet to be so far away. If only I was levelheaded enough to allot the whole of 5 months into reviewing, I might have had the chance.

But I was my usual stupid, immature self. So I had to dodge the question every time I was asked. Was I a topnotcher? Zeus, no, I wasn’t. Because I was and am not that brilliant. I am not as smart as people think I am. Then add to that my lazyass, you have the perfect un-brilliant package.

At night when it is surrendered to the deafening silence, I always think about what I could be now if I had been better. I might have been offered better compensation, a better work, better chances and opportunities, better everything.

But being the firm believer of optimism and life’s grandiosity in the grand scheme of things, I still am twenty-two and going twenty-three in a month’s time. I still have a huge portion of my life ahead of me and I cling to the more sanguine supposition that all of my mistakes, the wrong decisions, and the juvenile-ness during my young life are my driving factors to my goal of being the best version of myself.

I wish that when I come back to this post, I have decided what I want to do in my life. It could be being a doctor, a lawyer, or I could pursue a very old penchant to when I was only a little child and be a teacher. Right now, I am leaning towards enrolling into Law school because Med School basically needs more time (all of your time, actually) and more money so I can’t exactly do that ’cause I need to retain my job while studying. I want to be able to tend to all of my needs because my parents have done their responsibilities to me and it’s high time I do mine.

If a divine being permits a different course, I will gladly entertain such opportunity. Until then, I will have to set my goals in accordance to the limits of my… repository.

My Wizard and Demigod

Revisiting this series has brought more intense feeling than I got myself ready for. I thought I could read each book from the series while I read other books in between and never have I thought very wrong. Once I started the first book, I wanted to read the next. You’d think I have not read it from a year in my very young life. So I finished the first four books in a week. I decided to take a break because I wanted to read another book from another favorite author. You can call him Rick Riordan. Continue reading “My Wizard and Demigod”

Sexual Liberation

I never realized how perfect human anatomy is until the concept of sex eluded my mind. Did the one divine consider the number of sex positions one could make from a certain configuration of the human body?

But what are the underlying grounds for one to say that a certain human body conception is perfect? We have not seen a body structure other than what have now so the idea of perfect is contentious; probably more fallacious than contentious, now that I think about it. You can’t pose an argument about something that doesn’t exist re basis for the conception of perfect human body structure that allows the most sex positions. Continue reading “Sexual Liberation”